For Sale: 100 Ballfields, Price: $200 Million


The recent controversy about the Evansville Convention and Visitors Bureau’s intention to spend $18 Million to demolish Robert’s Stadium and build 8 little league baseball fields has really drawn much of the City of Evansville into the debate about value. As previously reported by the City County Observer, there are Cadillac quality sports parks springing up all over the country yet we can’t seem to find any location that has spent over $2 Million each on little league ballfields.

Having been hectored continuously about how tight municipal budgets are and about how Evansville is a working class enclave with little money to spare, the City County Observer believes that our existing ballfields may just hold the solution to some of our economic doldrums and may even seed of future of prosperity. There must be some magic in the Ohio River that makes little league ballfields worth $2 Million each right here in little old Evansville. The beauty is that legend has it that we already have about 100 little league fields. Given local valuations our ballfields must be worth about $200 Million.

Our proposal is quite simple. We propose that the City of Evansville find a good realtor or business broker to sell our portfolio of ballfields. Our expectation of course it to raise approximately $200 Million from the sale and to use that money to rectify or improve some other areas in which we are lacking. Here are some of our ideas.

1. Sewer and Water Repairs ($200 Million is not enough but it is a good start)
2. Deferred Maintenance on City of Evansville Roads
3. Repair the Parks that we currently have
4. Clean up the Litter problem that continues to Plague the City of Evansville
5. Pay off the Arena and Centre Bonds
6. Establish a Business Investment Fund
7. New Industrial Park
8. Slackwater Port on the West Bank of the Ohio River
9. Establish a Clean Energy Research Center
10. Build a Downtown Convention Hotel (Actually build 5 or 6 for $200 Million)
11. Build 1,000 Front Door Pride houses

This is just a small portion of the list of activities that could be considered if we can really sell our portfolio of ballfields for $2 Million each and redeploy that money into other things. Of course we don’t really believe that ballfields are worth $2 Million each and are quite skeptical of the results that have been proposed that these 8 little fields of dreams will generate. We just wanted to put things into perspective. Please feel free to post your own suggestion on what the City of Evansville could do with the proceeds of this previously unrecognized value of our golden ballfields.


  1. Now we’re talking!

    Let’s be honest, what is GAGE’s biggest problem? (wink, wink) Obviously, the weather/climate. How can you possibly be expected to properly entertain the masses when you can’t get good weather the day of?

    As Obama might say… “The stars are aligning”, to possibly save GAGE.

    With 200 Million, the basically defunct NASA program, lots of community organizer types that will be voted out of congress, and local unions looking to build government monuments… First, we’ll get the best organizer types we can find. (names withheld) We’ll harness those skills to suckle bailout/stimulus money home, add it to the 200, and then bond it to the hilt.

    Then, here’s the key, we’ll buy up some of NASA’s old, useless, solid rocket boosters on the cheap. We have our eager beaver unions conspire to mount the boosters on a massive gimbal in the sky. If aimed properly, and with enough jet fuel, in a decade we’ll be as close to the new equator as we want to be.

    The old McCurdy will be Evansville’s new Club Med, and GAGE will contract so much damned government sponsored fun – the barge system will be needed to keep the supply of booze up!

    Hold up, did I hear you guys say the $2 million is not realistic? Never mind.

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