“BE KIND-NO CRINKLES”
by Joe Langerak
AUGUST 3, 2022
My daughter, Martha Mae, is 11. We have a close relationship and she is without a doubt a “daddy’s girl.†When we see each other after I return from work she always greets me with a big smile and a warm hug. It’s a highlight for me each day. She is very bright and especially keen on picking up on my mood– she can tell how things are going with me. Oh yeah, she also happens to have Down Syndrome.
A few months ago, I was having a really tough day. I was stressed and anxious. I always give Martha Mae a hug and a kiss before she goes to sleep. That night, I bent over her bed to tuck her in, and give her a hug and kiss, but before I could she put both hands on my face, looked me dead in the eyes, and said “Be Kind- No Crinkles.â€Â As she said, “No Crinkles,†she pointed to my forehead in between my eyebrows. She then kissed me, and I left her room. I melted. She knew, she somehow knew I was having a rough day and she was reminding me to simply be kind to all, and don’t get too frustrated, daddy. I asked my wife Julia about it and neither of us had seen it before and had no idea where it came from. She has done this every single night since it started, unprompted. I adore it.
I hadn’t really told anyone about this beyond family, but in passing I told my friend and future partner Mike “Gabo†Gabovitch during dinner a few weeks back. He appreciated the story and I thought nothing else of it. Well, on July 5, when he and I celebrated our firm’s merging, he made the most wonderful toast during dinner. In part of it, he brought up Martha Mae and her phrase – “Be Kind, No Crinkles.†He went on to tell me how he and many folks at his former firm – Katz Korin Cunningham – had embraced the mantra and how it touched them. He then presented me and the other 13 dinner guests with a rambler cup with “Be Kind-No Crinkles”. – Martha Langerak†written on it. At this point, I was trying to hold my composure during dinner because someone saw the wisdom in my 11-year-old daughter that I thought only my family sees, and then they shared that wisdom with others in their law firm. I will never forget the kindness of Gabo’s words that night, and his gesture.
When I reflect on that dinner, and what Gabo said, I realize what Martha is saying is so very wise, and so needed right now, and others outside my family should take note of her wisdom. We are coming out of a pandemic that has impacted us all, our country is divided on too many issues to count, and horrific displays of mass violence seem more prevalent than ever. But, as we carry on in our professional and personal lives, I suggest we take to heart the words of an 11-year-old from Evansville, Indiana who just happens to have Down Syndrome, named Martha Mae, because I think she is on to something.
Be Kind-No Crinkles!
What a surprise! Thank you for recognizing Martha Mae. Such a wise little kid. We love her.
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